In the professional world, having a mentor or mentors is important. A mentor is someone who is usually older and more successful than you are. Someone who is willing to act as a teacher, counselor and friend to you, with the specific purpose of helping you reach your career goals. Your mentor should be someone who has qualities that you value and would like to learn.
There are many types of mentor relationships. Some companies have formal mentoring programs, while others allow co-workers to develop their own relationships. Some mentors meet with their mentee every week and some just meet one time per month. It's up to you to decide how often you and your mentor meet.
While the mentor/mentee relationship can be complicated and not easily defined, here's some advice for finding a mentor and making the best of the relationship.
Finding a Mentor
- When looking for a mentor, try to pick someone you can relate to in some way. If you are a young, liberal woman, an older conservative man may not be the best choice.
- Choose someone you respect. Your goal is to build a relationship and you must respect the person first.
- Find someone who has accomplished something you want to accomplish or who has accomplished something similar. If your goal is to be a professional writer then a scientist is probably not your best choice for a mentor.
- Make sure they are willing to be a mentor. You may think someone would make a good mentor, but they may be too busy with work or family to have the time to add another relationship to their lives.
Growing the Relationship
- Don't demand too much of their time. You may have set meeting times or you may have a more informal relationship, but be respectful of their time. Let them set the terms for the relationship. Being respectful of their time also includes knowing exactly what you would like to talk to them about before the next time you meet.
- Take an interest in them as a person. They are nice enough to be lending their time, wisdom and experiences to you, the least you can do is to take an interest in their lives. Ask about their family or tell a joke or a funny personal story. Ask them about their hobbies and interests outside of work. You don't have to over do it, but let them know that you sincerely value them, not just what they can do for you.
- Offer to help them out in any way you can. If you have something to offer them, no matter how small, offer it. You can give them a ride to the airport or proofread a document. They may not take you up on the offer, but they will appreciate that you offered.
- Let them know specifically how the advice they've given you has helped.
- Don't count on them to figure everything out for you. They are there to steer you in the right direction, not to do your work for you.
- Be appreciative. Take every opportunity to let them know you appreciate the time and wisdom they share with you. Don't be afraid to pay them back with small things like a cup of coffee. Small gestures can go a long way.